Conditioning cancels out efforts of Meditation in personal spiritual journey.

What I am writing is based upon my own experiences.

I did lots of mistakes/sin, like everyone else, but learned from them and never repeated after learning from them. Once i go deeper and try to understand the real cause behind it, then just the understanding causes it to evaporate immediately.

Jesus brought back the sheep, rare sheep it was, that has left the herd in his shoulders! He rewarded going astray in search of a master, (spiritual path), it needs courage.

It is a great message that being a human we can learn and realising our own self, soul or Krishna consciousness is the greatest learning in itself. How a person could attain to that peak without learning?

So committing sin/mistake is part and parcel of human life and there is no need to feel guilty of it, once we understood the real reason and learned from it.

This life lived well in search of self or soul or Krishna consciousness is a haven and wasted in fear, guilt etc by being dependent on bookish knowledge of others and not taking responsibility to search, mistake, learn again and again yourself is a hell.

There is no other place than this, for us at least, and there is no better opportunity to be given birth as human being on it. We are already living in the best time in the history of humanity. अब नहीं तो कब?

I also used to regurgitate what is taught from birth treating as my own knowledge. It is conditioning only. Unless and until I came to know the answer of most prominent question ‘Who am I?’, said Ramana Maharshi, all I know was not my own but borrowed. Buddha said his last word ‘Sammasati’ ie You all are by default Buddha, before you come to know about it they were changed by society you live in. It was necessary to take care of you during those years. It is also necessary that as a grown up person you know your defaults too.

Systematically poured into my mind. A person’s effort to search your original face or ‘Aadhaar Manush’(as Baul fakhir’s of Bengal call it) that you have at the time of or prior to birth- simply evaporates all these forced effort or conditioning done to cover it up. It is quite natural that person will look for it at least once in life. Evaporation of conditioning depends upon sincerity of the effort. Otherwise it has to be deliberately understood using heart to get it evaporated.